Recommitting

It’s February. We are over a month into the new year. I’ve been adrift this last couple of weeks, holding on to my life boat while being tossed around at sea. Now I’m feeling land under my feet again and I need to publicly recommit to a few things.

1. Writing. I am in awe of those who blog daily often and blog well. Not just a few words or a photo (those are challenging enough) but well thought out, coherent, lovely posts that make me want to stop, sit and ponder. I am smart enough to know that is completely out of my realm right now, but I don’t want to let my blog slip-slide into the corner with the dust-bunnies and dirty laundry.  One of my intentions for 2010 is to write daily by the end of the year (although I’m sure much of it won’t be fit for human consumption). In the spirit of being gentle with myself,  I am letting go of “should’s” and committing to two blog posts weekly.

2. Finding the lightness. My spirit has been heavy the last couple of weeks. With good reason, if I were looking for reasons, which I’m not. There’s a phrase on the Vision Board I created at the beginning of the year: Suffering is Optional. While allowing myself to be fully present in whatever situation and emotion I find myself in, I recommit to letting go and finding the beauty in each breath.

3. My marriage. This actually has a lot to do with #2. There is nothing wrong with my marriage that more sleep, some couple time and a little lightness won’t fix. I’ve noticed myself feeling annoyed lately and when that happens, I know it’s more about me than my husband. He hasn’t changed but how I’m reacting to him has. It means I’m taking myself too seriously and not asking for what I want. We are so busy parenting, growing businesses, growing ourselves, that I feel the “us-ness” has slipped out of balance. Like the squeaky hinge on our bedroom door, it’s an easy fix. I just need to give it (and him) a little attention.

4. My daily meditation. I have only missed one day since the beginning of the year but my meditations this last week weren’t very satisfying. While acknowledging that the challenges were real – I was in a hotel room with a toddler who was up way past her bedtime most nights – I take responsibility for my willingness to let my priorities come last. This is a growth area for me (to put it mildly) so I am wrapping myself in the arms of forgiveness, letting go and moving on.

I dropped my intentions for 2010 into the pond of my life and the ripples have been dancing outward in the most beautiful way. I appreciate the space to look back, to re-evaluate, to re-commit. What about you? What do you need to (re)commit to?

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~ by Alana on February 8, 2010.

11 Responses to “Recommitting”

  1. Exercise. I have seriously struggled to get back into a routine after the Christmas/New Year break and my exercise regime has suffered immensely. I herby recommit to exercise. Thanks for the nudge in the right direction.

    p.s. What a well thought out, coherent, lovely post.

    🙂

  2. Great post! I had to step up and recommit to one of my goals yesterday. I’m glad to see I’m not the only one who may not have been perfect but is still committed to reaching it. You gave me a lot to think about today. Thanks

  3. Excellent reminder. I need to recommit to seeing the extraordinary blessing that exist in my regular life. To be here rather than worrying about the future or reliving and missing the past.
    Thanks for this eloquent reminder that it is okay to begin again.

  4. Welcome back, lady! This is a beautiful statement of recommitment. I, too, must recommit, on a daily basis, to embracing my life and all its foibles rather than running from it, to step into the sun (literally, to get outside and commune with nature), to continue the job hunt from a place of acceptance and positivity, and to create. Whew! Hard work. You inspire me to attempt it. Thanks. 🙂

  5. Wonderful statement on where you are and where you are going. One of the many things I love about you.

  6. Princess Adora – exercise is on my list too but I’m trying to keep things manageable. Good luck – let me know how it goes!

    Kevin – I am definitely “not-so-perfect” but reaching for those goals helps keep the journey interesting. Glad you found the energy/desire to recommit too!

    Lindsey – gosh, that’s the hardest thing isn’t it? To not worry about the future or relive the past. Whew. Particularly as a tired mama 🙂
    Here’s to daily beginnings.

    Emma – it’s a mutual inspiration society. I love it.

    Steve – I’m glad there are still many things you love about me 🙂

  7. what do i need to recommit to? well, to answer a question with a question: is there a character limit to a comment placed here? seriously, though. it sounds like you’re not beating yourself up about the need for “re”, and i’m glad about that. you’re also not overcommitting, either, and that earns you another “good girl”. as for your writing, sugar, anything you post will be a welcome sight for these eyes, so you just let us be the judge of that. mkay? xo and glad to see you back here.

  8. I enjoyed this post because I can empathize! *Right there with you*

    I guess “Running” is my thing that has really slipped. I was training for a 1/2 marathon to have been run mid-January and had been doing really since the end of October. I missed the race (kinda of something silly like the Seinfeld alarm clock issue! if you’ve ever seen that one) and it really bummed me out. Time to rejuvenate and get back with it. To that end, I signed back up with “focusnfly” (online training) ~ first steps are great!

    Just like this post!

  9. I am right there with you on this. I don’t know what it’s been about the last few weeks…maybe just too many expectations for myself to come bursting into the new year with ___ (fill in the blank). Writing, letting go so I can free up space to create, meditating more, exercise. You have inspired me, to continue to look at myself through gentle eyes and recommit where it’s needed – even if it starts over every day 🙂

  10. jeanne – you make me laugh! mkay – ha! I can hear you saying it. Thank you.

    bonnie – first steps are great – as is the thousandth even when it feels like the first (right?!). I want to hear the missing-the-marathon story.

    olive & hope – thanks for being right here with me.

  11. Alana, it’s good to see you back. And I just know anything and everything you write is ALWAYS “fit for human consumption”. I love your writing and always look forward to it. I trust that you will write when it is right. Your voice is obviously valued and treasured. Sweet love. Sweet dreams.

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